Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize