my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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