I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize