Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry cc28 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(805): View more from California

When do i get to see u next week?

(1-805): View more from California

When I teabag your entire family

Fav 12 1529 2801
share tweet
(909): View more from California

i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.

Fav 17 3343 5032
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(504): View more from Louisiana

how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children

Fav 11 2860 4616
share tweet
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well

Fav 7 4277 1132
share tweet
(773): View more from Illinois

The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.

Fav 5 3256 1106
share tweet
(773): View more from Illinois

i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...

Fav 4 2719 1385
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(504): View more from Louisiana

This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.

Fav 5 1164 3044
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(205): View more from Alabama

I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.

Fav 0 370 522
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(541): View more from Oregon

Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate

Fav 0 5 42
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT