Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Randomize
