fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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