I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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