i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
We need to rekindle our bromance
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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