the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
