My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize