Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
