Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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