i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
