epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize