drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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