go do what you do best...puke behind churches
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
