Moan for me like Helen Keller
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
