I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
