Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."

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(406): View more from Montana

Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night

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19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags

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(905): View more from Ontario

I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem

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(716): View more from New York

I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew

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(425): View more from Washington

Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.

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