Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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