Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
