Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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