Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize