she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
