My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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