i don't like sucking hair
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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