I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
