Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
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We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
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I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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