just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize