i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
