Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize