i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
