Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
This is the high leading the old right now
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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