apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize
