A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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