O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
so much tequila, so little girl.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
