I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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