The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
