I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Randomize
