Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
