The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
