I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize