I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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