It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
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