I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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