sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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