Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
