oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
