Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
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I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
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I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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