If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
