fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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